1. starllex:

    this is my favorite post of all time

    (Source: carlsagan)

  2. Awesome sale, DWR.  Good job.

    Awesome sale, DWR.  Good job.

  3. aatombomb:

nickdouglas:

bestrooftalkever:

pleatedjeans:

via

yes good let’s share a bunch of this stuff on the internet so that impressionable youths think that marriage is like a cute, more-twee version of Cato vs. Clouseau.
"Honey, come in here, we need to go over these accounts again. I don’t think we’re making enough return on the CD to justify not moving some of that into baby jeffery’s college account."
"BABE COME IN HERE I MADE A PILLOW FORT!"

You’re right Nick, we need to hide any pleasures of marriage and continue projecting it as a plodding monotony punctuated with stressful fights and breakdowns. Ten more years of Everybody Loves Raymond!

Hetero-BORE-mative.

Fake and straight

    aatombomb:

    nickdouglas:

    bestrooftalkever:

    pleatedjeans:

    via

    yes good let’s share a bunch of this stuff on the internet so that impressionable youths think that marriage is like a cute, more-twee version of Cato vs. Clouseau.

    "Honey, come in here, we need to go over these accounts again. I don’t think we’re making enough return on the CD to justify not moving some of that into baby jeffery’s college account."

    "BABE COME IN HERE I MADE A PILLOW FORT!"

    You’re right Nick, we need to hide any pleasures of marriage and continue projecting it as a plodding monotony punctuated with stressful fights and breakdowns. Ten more years of Everybody Loves Raymond!

    Hetero-BORE-mative.

    Fake and straight

  4. aatombomb:

smdxn:

NJ diocese: We’re not liable, because molesting boys not part of priest’s official duties

“You can determine a priest is not on duty when he is molesting a child, for example,” the attorney argued. “A priest abusing a child is absolutely contrary to the pursuit of his master’s business, to the work of a diocese.”
Be careful, the circular logic might give you whiplash. 

Yeah, you’ll really laugh when you find out that the law calls this not-an-official-duty-so-my-boss-can’t-get-blamed defense a “frolic and detour.”

    aatombomb:

    smdxn:

    NJ diocese: We’re not liable, because molesting boys not part of priest’s official duties

    “You can determine a priest is not on duty when he is molesting a child, for example,” the attorney argued. “A priest abusing a child is absolutely contrary to the pursuit of his master’s business, to the work of a diocese.”

    Be careful, the circular logic might give you whiplash. 

    Yeah, you’ll really laugh when you find out that the law calls this not-an-official-duty-so-my-boss-can’t-get-blamed defense a “frolic and detour.”

  5. How does one learn to Make Love To The Camera?

    (Source: rubyredwisp)

  6. joshfrench:

    erikonymous:

    beerburritowhiskey:

    Dolly Parton singing “Jolene” at 33 rpm. This might surprise you.

    Perfect song is still perfect.

    Holy shit somebody sample this before Macklemore does

    Hands down best Jolene I’ve ever heard.

  7. clarencerosario:

Thanks to @Slopecellars, I now have the ingredients for a proper Brooklyn Cocktail (v. just subbing rye in a Manhattan)

Ahhhhh!  That Bigallet is MAGIC!  (As is James, where I first had it last week.)  Looks like off to Slope Cellars I go…

    clarencerosario:

    Thanks to @Slopecellars, I now have the ingredients for a proper Brooklyn Cocktail (v. just subbing rye in a Manhattan)

    Ahhhhh! That Bigallet is MAGIC! (As is James, where I first had it last week.) Looks like off to Slope Cellars I go…

  8. theawl:

    St. Patrick’s Day in Ireland.

    Isn’t that a Scotch egg?

  9. deepomega:

cordjefferson:

Alex Colville’s “Pacific,” the painting that inspired the shots of De Niro’s empty-ass apartment right on the water in Heat.

This made me go rent and watch Heat.

See you in seven and a half weeks

    deepomega:

    cordjefferson:

    Alex Colville’s “Pacific,” the painting that inspired the shots of De Niro’s empty-ass apartment right on the water in Heat.

    This made me go rent and watch Heat.

    See you in seven and a half weeks

  10. A Good Heist Show →

    screen-name:

    I think a good heist show would be about a top group of heist artists (heisters?) who devise a plan for the perfect heist. “This is the perfect heist,” Nemo, the leader, says. The rest of the team agrees, if not perfect, it’s at least a pretty good heist. Then they go get beers at the Rusty…

    A+. Would watch.